My Two Year Fork in the Road

Why did I take this path and when does it end?

December 2, 2019

As each week goes by, the more I start to think about this journey. Why did I take this path and when does it end? 

I wanted a better life. A different life. I had missing pieces that I wanted to fill. I was bored and living pay check to pay check. So I started dreaming, started giving myself purpose. I didn't want to just coast by in life and my current daily grind wasn't fitting those desires.

So, I started a website, and taught myself game design. Built my first app and realized I didn't have an audience to market it to. So I created a newsletter and a YouTube channel.

Now it's two years later and I'm still going, but with a sort of crooked direction. I started on this path because I wanted to break the chains of my current job and lifestyle. I wanted to exchange work, time and patience for a more freeing life.

But, along the way I signed myself up for a lot of commitments. I post here weekly, I make two videos a month for my YouTube channel and I have a whiteboard of game ideas that I'm waiting for a free moment to develop and now I just bought a new business. As each month passes, the less free time I seem to find.

My life is a lot more fulfilling and by the end of the year I should also be in a much better place financially, so at what point do I decide I've made it?

Two years ago, I could've never predicted the path I am currently on, yet here I am, feeling successful. Or are my problems the same, but they're disguised as something new and flashy?

Because now I feel like I can take less time off, travel less and do less. 

My commitments have become my limiting factors, not money. But I love everything I do, so what's the problem?

Maybe there isn't one. 

But maybe as I approach my two year anniversary, I should re-evaluate my direction, my goals and my purpose. 

I'd love to keep doing all three things, but maybe it's time I choose one to discard. 

If you were me, what would you do?

(wal•do) — Person
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